What Deep Desires Drive Your Clients To Look For Help?

November 22, 2021 Off By carmala

Image by John Hain on Pixabay (https://pixabay.com/users/johnhain-352999/)

 

July 29, 2021

 

Most people are aware of their superficial motivations. 

“I want to buy these shoes.” (They’re really cool.) 

“I want to watch that game.” (I love the Packers or . . .)

“I want to go out to eat this weekend.” (I’m tired of cooking and want someone else to do it.)”

“I want to give to that charity.” (I’ll feel good about myself for helping those less fortunate people.)

But, almost always, there are deeper desires driving those decisions. As a personal coach or spiritual teacher, are you aware of those more foundational drivers? 

Recognizing the underlying motivations is key to your marketing efforts. If you can touch into your prospective clients’ core desires, they’ll connect more readily with you. It will help you stand out. 

What are deeper motivations?

Theodore Levitt, a Harvard marketing professor, once said, “People don’t want to buy a quarter-inch drill bit. They want a quarter-inch hole.”

I lived that!

“I’ve got to go to Menard’s and get an extra-long, 3/8” drill bit,” I announced to my friend, Michelle. I had dropped my 2 dogs off at her house for a week of playing with her 3 dogs because I was going to be traveling.

She replied, “You’re a single woman with, if I might say, C- construction skills. Why are you driving all the way to Menards’s to get this huge drill bit?” 

“I need it for the porches we might be building.”  

I couldn’t argue her C- comment. Actually, it was a generous grade.

“Is it worth the drive and cost of the bit just in case you might build a deck?”

I felt like I had to justify my decision. “I need it to connect the 4”x 4” posts and the 2” x 8” boards we’ll be using to build decks and steps. Who knows how far away I will be from a store that carries them once I get there.”

Truth be told, I expected to only use it once a year on our church work trip to serve people in the Tribal nations somewhere in the USA. And then it’s only if I”m building a deck or handicap ramp. If we’re painting, it’ll just sit in my toolbox. I’ll find out which it is when I get there.

Driving to the store I questioned myself. “Do I really want to spend the miles and a few bucks on this drill bit?”

Yes. Yes I do. It’s important!

That got me thinking.

Theodore Levitt was right. I don’t care about the drill bit. I care about making a straight, long hole for the carriage bolts to go through the posts and the frame boards. The carriage bolts connect the 4” x 4” posts to the 2” x 8” boards that make up the frame that everything else attaches to. 

(If you know construction words, what I just called a frame you would call a header. That doesn’t make any sense to me. I think I’ll keep calling it a frame.) 

But, the carriage bolts that attach the posts and frame boards make the deck and stairs far stronger. The residents will have a sturdy, reliable porch for many years. 

And then I’ll feel good. I’m serving them and doing a quality job. I get that warm feeling inside that I made somebody’s life a little better. A little safer. 

There’s also a secret place in my mind where I recognize it assuages some of my guilt. As a white woman, I have to see the poverty and terrible houses my government has imposed on these residents. Maybe a week of my life and some labor will be a small act of redemption. 

Those are a lot of expectations to put on a $10 drill bit. 

It’s worth it.

People can find what’s really driving them

In my years of education, training, and practice as a spiritual director, pastor, and marketer, I’ve learned how to ask those probing questions. “Underneath that is something else,” I’ll say, encouraging clients to reflect further. “Go deeper. Poke around in that for a little bit. There’s something else.”

Bless their hearts, people are typically capable of finding it! I just have to ask the question and listen. 

The same applies to your clients. At some level, if they have the capacity for self-reflection and the courage to look, they’ll discover what their core motivations are. 

They benefit from recognizing the deeper truth. 

There is a side benefit to you, simply because that’s the nature of relationships. Your clients will teach you about what brings people to your practice. After a number of those conversations, you’ll likely hear some common themes. 

Those themes are like gold as you put yourself out to the world as a therapist, coach, or spiritual teacher. You can go beyond the superficial. You’ll connect with people beyond everyday fluff.

Consider the example I gave at the very beginning of this article.

“I want to buy those shoes. They’re so cool.” 

There’s certainly more to it. “I want to buy those shoes so . . . I’ll look great to others. . . . and feel better about myself when people like how I look . . . and I’ll reinforce my sense of belonging to the group of people I spend time with . . .”

What needs are really important to people as they search for  . . . anything? 

When someone Google’s “life coach” or “high-performance coach” or “spiritual teacher” or “therapist”, what deep unmet need is urging them forward? 

I think it’s safe to eliminate simple curiosity. So, what do they need? Deep down inside themselves, what are they looking for? 

Help prospective clients with your first contact

You know those times when you’re looking for something but don’t know what it is? You think to yourself, “I hope I’ll recognize it when I see it.”

That “something” is what you want to name in your marketing material. It’s what your current clients have already taught you. 

How do you do that?

Here are three ways to build your prospective clients’ deeper desires into your marketing material.

  1. Interview your current and past clients to find out what they learned about the real issues that brought them to you. Keep probing respectfully to help them look deeply within. Are there recurring themes? They will certainly apply to future clients.
  1. Use stories to ease prospects into their awareness of the profound yearning that is driving them. Have those stories center around the issues you discovered in the previous step. Stories feel much safer than direct information. They draw us in. Share them in your emails, e-newsletters, blogs, and website. 
  1. Resist the temptation to use your knowledge of their deeper desires to manipulate prospective clients. Marketing is always about inviting people to change something important in their lives. Inviting is ethical and respectful. 

If you would like to talk more about exploring your prospects’ deeper motivations and how to incorporate those into your marketing, contact me at carmala@carmalaaderman.com or message me on LinkedIn.